If you read my blog regularly which I pray and hopefully assume no one actually does, you’ll probably notice I spend a lot of time complaining, whinging, whining, moaning etc. because I don’t have everything I want, and sometimes I complain because I do. That’s just the way I am.
I think Karl Lagerfeld made some comment about the need to find dissatisfaction in your work in order to drive the need to improve. I’m totally like that, I’ll never be happy, that’s the curse of ambition.
But I don’t know if it’s bringing the right vibe to my art because remember this blog is kind of like a sandpit where I can play with ideas while developing music and video and pushing forward episodic content that’s neatly presented and executed however basically.
I don’t know how much pouring forth about general untethered disappointment does for my image, I mean, y’know. That’s not the vibe I want to project with my art. Hope, yes. Light amidst the darkness, gold amongst the shit, I identify with that.
But artistically th eprojection, the depiction is not balanced, accurate in it’s narrative property.
In a normal narrative this would be glossed over in a paragraph, not turned into a years worth of blog entries of what’s wrong with Romantech today or what romantech doesn’t like.
But now we have a high powered new technological solution to filing away all this super important information under “self indulgent crap”, so feel free to laugh along as we nuke buzzkilling drivel on this blog and ship it off wholesale to eek it’s existance out in some dreadful gulag style labour camp as pigfeed for google search rankings and article marketing.
It’s deviously delicious. In one fell swoop all this indulgence about me doing my ludicrously idealistic pining for some non existant perfected lifescuplting is removed from my artist blog so I can maintain the projection of a respectable artist.
And all this nonsense is dispatched to some use building my business, because it’s not as if I don’t sit there thinking, well, y’know if everything was sorted out then I wouldn’t have anything to moan about, and just venting on my blog, y’know is it really achieveing anything?
It’s not suitable to not be making progress, so now we’ve found a positive way of how I describe as “farming out” all this nonsense I have to process as y’know an artistic individual but at least this way if I ever get fans I’m not continually burdening them with it.
But I’m going to post it here anyway for a little while at least so the record can show that it’s not like a sit around distraught and overwhelmed by the endless quest for something more. I forge forth. That’s right. Y’know? There’s always a better way.
At the end of the day it’s about getting business done, not wondering whether that reason that you felt weird then was some weird thing and why and stuff. Y’know, what good is that. I mean it is some good, it’s like panning for gold you do slowly turn up information and perspectives that may be useful, but I think I’d be much better serving my goals if I showed up for work at the romantech website with my nonsense all sorted out so I can throw down some real talk rather than obsessing over some trivialities.
But my idea is also funny and creative too, although that’s a total flight of fancy but y’know, why not harbour a gleeful thought that some random individuals will eventually decipher where all this hidden nonsense was shipped off to and depply hidden vibes will lurk there in.
Anything with steam behind it can power through. If I’m motivated by the idea that I’m actually moving forward – especially if I actually am – it’ll be more effective because I can actually apply myself with vigour, which I’m very good at, maybe even as good as I am at being self indulgent and obsessive.
But on this blog, it’s about art and keeping art from breaking down into mundane biography and self portraiture,however I don’t mind painting a brief portrait of the artist, as ambattled by motivations both artistic and economic, but steadfastly and resolutely seeking solutions.
