Czech it Out

by Matt Romantech on September 21, 2017

It is time to leave ukraine, and I am okay with it.

After I got the courage to ask a girl out and she said yes, and I got played by that other girl, well I’ve feel like I’ve got full spectrum of experiences.

Now I’m in prague and I’ve been to a drum and bass gig and rinsed it out, I have scored some weed, and just now I’ve gone and looked at all the buildings and I’m starting to feel I’ve done what I came to do, I have checked it out.

Now it’s next move. Learn my russian, do my yoga. Start recognise how you’re integrating what you’re learning into what you’re doing. You’re not here just to take snaps of buildings.

Because there were girls in ukraine, you could engage with that, we had to, that was our priority.

We’re not in ukraine any more. We don’t have the need for that engagement.

But now I feel dislocated from that mission.

***

It just keeps coming back to the trading, it always does, I shouldn’t worry about little bills slipping into my holiday because it will never eclipse the $8k that got sucked into my trading, but I remind myself just what we learned – how on the edge we really are – but we’re not. we now have the massive hedges up.

The euro will rise. The dollar will fall. It will happen eventually. It is likely the pound may have found a range it never breaks again for the next few years at least.

One day the risk will come and australia and NZ will get smashed, but I won’t be holding NZ. My yen positions will still be as tiny as they always have been and it won’t matter. When extreme risk comes all my USD longs will pay off because all that loss will unwind.

It is true I can take some risks now, adding to the hedge. If it continues to reverse, It’s hardly going to hurt. It isn’t able to start falling on the other side until we get to the reverse point of where we were, that is so far away.

The eurgbp, one of my biggest pairs may certainly be locked in a permanent range. I can experiment with this pair.

The opposite is CADUSD – the gap is too big, so I can experiment with the chance to let it unwind. If I’m right, hedge, I’m wrong, hedge.

I just can’t help but feel that we’re going to see an active range now as it spends the rest of the year trying to regain what it’s just lost in the last week or so, and that’s where we can get back in the game.

I feel like we have an opportunity now that we can work with, without the taking the risks we exposed ourselves to previously.

***

But now we need to see what happens outside of trading.

We have some tasks to complete. It seems we should attempt to work through them, engaging with any anxieties that

After all it seems like the main goal is to simply complete the trip, without blowing out too much cash.

Again the trading throws a curveball with a margin increase for german elections, I have to stay smart.

I have to think about what it is I’m trying to do here.

Learn russian, get fit, write music. It’s not that difficult, you will need to meditate long term on what you experienced here.

How will I pay my bills? It’s $300. I can get the dole if I can be bothered. I’ll dig up $100 out of kurb.

I have those options available to me.

I still got $50k to my name, and lets be real – $50k in trading, and my trees. I am not washed up by any means.

But the trading won’t offer you a dividend yet.

You can’t set up free rent. But perhaps I need some time to reflect on it.

***

I think

What is the argument for you to not come home?

Well it might start by asking what exactly are you going to come home to? Well to build up my trading so it looks like I have a hope of supporting myself which I clearly don’t have right now,

If you want to visit romania for 5 days its going to cost you $350 does that sound like a good deal?

It’s going to probably cost you over $100 in new zealand anyway so it only costs $250.

Then why don’t you go to greece as well? Because of sick of dragging all this luggage around. I hate the drama with the taxi and everything, i’m just wasting energy on worry.

Now I was just trying to reason my way into romania and it just keeps on slamming me – why is there no easy option to get transport – the bus and the train aren’t cheap, still $40-100, still take such a long time,

What is my best option to get to bucharest? The bus that leaves at 6.30 and takes 7.5 hours and costs $40.

That is such a long bus, I just can’t understand why it takes so long? Because it would usually take 5 hours, and it has stops.

It’s just – think about it, that’s half the flight time of one of my two flights home and it’s just a few hundred km’s away, it’s as far as tauranga. The bus to tauranga costs $40 but would only be 4 hours.

It just keeps occurring to me that if I had a rental car it wouldn’t be this issue. I could leave when I liked, no taxi, and no worries about weight restriction, you drive in a ring route so you don’t have to pay relocation charges.

What is the difference between leaving now because it’s too much hassle, and coming back in april and starting back where you left off??? Like honestly what is the difference?

Either do it now, and it’s hassle and a stress, or do it next time, break it out. You know this argument makes sense even though the counter argument is . . . youre going home because you bought too much luggage?

I’m not going home right away, i’m going home 3 and a half weeks early. It makes sense.

I will miss ride. But I feel that I have to make a decision, what do I want to achieve?

I want to get my focus happening, so i’m healthy and up to the challenge of getting my russian good.

So I can start working on my farm.

***

It’s done. I’m on my way home early, the vibe just built and built – it was that point – anything I can’t do now, I can do in april, with complete justification – I saved two and a half grand by coming home early. November is nicer in NZ than april anyway.

I am planning my next trip and already – well I need something to deploy strategy around and now I do, quickly I see, I don’t want to be prancing around prague and such, there’s no point, unless you’re taking a girl, I already knew this, and here’s where the strategy starts pumping in – what I clicked to right now – kiev works now because there are girls there, I’m not interested in a city without girls.

Kiev is the best city because it has the most girls. So you can go to kiev.

Why would you want to go anywhere else, without a girl? You’re not going to pick up a hot girl in these places.

I’m in kiev, with the hot girls, if I want to go anywhere else, I can take a girl with me.

Why would I go anywhere else? If there was a gig or I was taking a girl somewhere.

It’s all about the girls, that’s what matters, so focus on that. Except I only get 90 days in ukraine. so what that means is that I have to be in estonia for 2 months, I will be certainly there, I will likely only be a few weeks in the other areas at most because I need a serious base.

I can’t seriously get an apartment, for 2 months and then 1 month. I’m better off using airbnb, especially given I will likely want to get away to some other places espcially if i’ve met girls there.

What I’m seeing is that once again, you’re going to have to take a half step. You can’t really live anywhere, but you have to make progress towards the lifestyle you want which is chasing girls, and hiring one or two people to start doing some work for me.

Me doing the work at first because I have to – not just because I can’t afford it, but I am obviously not getting any clarity about exactly what it is these people will be doing and so I have to go to it.

Making my videos and websites so that the can learn to make them good for other people who will pay, but more importantly have this at my disposal – I can do websites for ideas for things.

Mainly I want to do my music and my videos, that’s what I do.

I have to go back to new zealand to teach myself to do what I do – get fit, learn russian and work on my music.

Just thinking and doing.

But it’s also about the next plan and working out what I need there.

With this trip, the next step was always a big part of the cost because there’s the trip, but there’s the taxi, and getting myself organised like that.

Basically you have your airfares, and then your weekly costs, which are the same. When you go to tallinn and beyond, well, costs are going to get up. But by then surely you can take it.

***

I know I have made the right decision to leave early, but I still woke up kind of sad, it is inevitable that there will be a come down and that is what I am acting against, I’m at that moment when I’m at the party and I know the come down will kick in soon, and if I act now to leave and start making my way home, it is the smartest decision, I will be reaching my bottom at a much better place to do that.

I feel the call of the need to work, and to create, I feel the need to get my body healthy, to get focused, to working on my music, to imprint these habits,

I feel that if I begin planning my next trip now, I’m going to be doing that with a new awareness, I know that the real focus is girls, it’s Darya I’m thinking of now. It doesn’t matter if it’s Darya or Victoria or some other girl, it’s girls that matter.

Amsterdam, Copenhagen, Helsinki, Prague, all great cities, I’m sure vienna and budapest and belgrade and sofia will be great to but do they have girls?

I’m sure they do, but you have to be orientated towards that, nice clothes, good haircut, have your routine organised so the order of business is

Every 4 or 5 days having to do this drama where I pack up, find the airport, station, have to be there early in case I get something wrong, then have to find my airbnb, it’s a big stress, I’m getting used to it now but I see that we really have to think about what the point of doing all this is.

I’ve got a good mind to either fly straight to kiev, or just stop in istanbul to chill, half way through april. I may have to leave ukraine in september anyway, will I get away with spending more than 90 days in europe, if I spend 60 days over july august around tallin, head to romania sept 18, then have 30 days to drive around, knowing that I could get as far as budapest or – wait id be going the other way.

But what are you trying to achieve?

Well if you have a girl, you want to take her nice places, there are emotions that come with travel that you can use to your advantage, especially russian girls who havent been able to travel much, it’s all a thrill for them. To pull them out of their life for a month is magic for them, all the emotions all the feelings.

You want to spend time with your girl, you want to go to nice restaurants, see the museum and the art gallery.

But without the girl, theres no point. Possibly if there are girls in serbia or budapest, sure then maybe, but there arent girls in prague or helsinki, so theres no point. Poland is also supposed to be good for girls.

So though you may want to set up in estonia, whether theres a girl youre serious about will determine whether you head to scandinavia or poland from there.

What I’m seeing is that I could be in turkey or serbia in march if I wanted to be because guess what – your costs in those countries are the same as they are at home, except youre in a city, with girls.

But the question then becomes what comes after girls?

You take darya back to your little farm and what?

You do what people do. You get up and stay fit working on the farm. You come in from working and you cook and you have a nice smoke and probably do some music and some video. Youre doing your trading, this is what you do. And it’s great to come here for the girls, but once you have a girl, it’s the next plan.

You wanted so much for your trading to build empires, but I think it’s time to accept that will take so long.

It was all motivated by cultivating little tarts to bang, what about when that no longer matters and is meaningless? I don’t think that that’s something you can simply just understand, and its another reason I feel I need to go home.

Theres a girl in russia for me. But the trading may never offer the opportunity to conquer all. It may be so long coming that you have to give up a lot of your plans, or at least adapt them to this new reality – you cant just wait and wait like this.

**

It figures that we get another break out in trading just when we book the ticket home. Having it all reverse like this is as incredible as what happened in the first place. We are so safe now, we can build again, and even have hope of kicking something out this year, of still reaching $5k this year.

What it shows is how I am victim to whatever the trading is doing.

Just one night has reaffirmed my belief I will be able to make money trading by next year, to pay for my trip.

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