Man that post yesterday on narrative and philosophy was bringing mad guru game up in this.

It doesn’t really eventuate to a lot of conclusions really, but I try, I just diddle on my journal it’s better than TV or games, I’m into my head man. I’m an artist, ok?

It’s all reduced to conflict and conflict is a story, is part of a narrative, is life and can be expressed by art.

Conflict is so natural and desirable that you would never want to destroy your enemies because as long as they test you, you are being challenged to be a better version of yourself in order to come against the conflicts that are inevitably in cycle for anybody.

You have to accept conflict as natural and as artist, a natural and essential part of the narrative.

Grabbing for all the goodies and harshly labouring and gloating in victory and kicking the enemy when they’re already down, none of that character is appropriate, because you’re just fueling more unresolved conflict. You’re on the conflict treadmill. But you need to be telling stories. What?

Well the stories are the natural descriptions of the conflicts? I mean the choices are the stories and the stories are art so therefore choices are art?

Well conflict is inevitable so your choices completely define everything. So what do you weigh your choices on? Experience and perception? Understanding?

Understanding is a lot of hard work.

See I’m not guru enough yet because half the time I don’t make sense. Well tell us what you want?

To be relevant, but the thing is as an artist, you gotta do you. But what if people don’t like you? Well what do you really want, there it is, the choice again, do you want to be an artist or do you just want people to like you? Do you enjoy the feeling or do you just feel like you need it, like a cigarette, or a drink, or a chocolate bar, a root, or a piss?

You want to be relevant.

Not famous, but aware and having some kind of association by which you have insight, knowledge, common experiences with others.

Well you’ve got to be so in their face with what you’re doing. Your message has to be strong, and I may not be top notch guru material because I’m not all about clobbering messages, and dualities, dichotomies and dialectics, I don’t know what’s going on. I just probably know more than most dudes walking around on the street. I know that’s not that humble, but I’m aware it’s just an assumption.

Where’s the clear message, where’s the clear story?

Your conflicts are your story. Your conflicts and the choices, your agency, that changes the nature of those conflicts.

I’m not preaching the gospel, I don’t have a dogmatic approach. How do you brand for an audience if you don’t have a message and once you’re refining your message for appeal isn’t it immediately diluted? That’s how I feel, I’ll spout nonsense on my blog night and day because it’s my right as an artist, and I’m more interested in expressing myself and understanding than summoning a pack of zombies to follow my word.

What’s the manifesto?

Do we choose to define ourselves by our audience? If more people like what we do as artist, is it more meaningful? How meaningful does it have to be to matter to you?

It’s like wealth. It’s relative. Do you feel rich? Do you feel lucky?

“Do you feel lucky” is obviously a theologically loaded philosophical proposition. Do you feel lucky, IE do you believe in fate/predestination?

But if you believe like I do that the universe has a will, then is there such thing as luck, if that’s the story already told? I think more realistically whether clint eastwood shoots anyone is not something that really matters in the greater scheme of the universe. But that’s simply just not true, because everything matters. If Clint Eastwood shoots somebody then it was meant to be for unknowable reasons beyond our comprehension.

Do you feel lucky? It’s the choices we make when faced with conflict that define us.

I choose to blog to resolve the conflicts of the unknowable, that some things we will never understand and we’re better to stay within the bounds of what we know.

And god spoke saying, go ye with a restful mind that these tasks I have set for you will give you rest, and you shall find peace in the everlasting kingdom.

“Different day, same shit, until one day, different shit. But still shit.”

Why am I not a normal person, a normal musician or artist who would blog relevant items? It’s just not really what I think about.

Creating art – expressions that depict and describe experiences – seems like the only relevant response to existence in my experience. Understanding is an undertaking in itself. The deepest complexities of existence are so deep to ponder that you have to be an artist to try and make sense of some of your experiences, or insight you’ve received into the complex nature of all things. How can you understand what it’s like to exist in the world without art?

You can run around and get all the money and all the girls, but what does it mean? If you define yourself by money or girls, you’re always losing the game to someone with more money or better girls. Life can’t be that one dimensional, money and girls – if you see them as just money and girls, it’s reductive of the real benefits derived from working and relationships.

Fame, recognition, respect, acclaim, is divorced from the merit from which it derives if you merely see it in terms of outcomes. A story is about development and resolution, if it started at the end there would be no story, just an outcome, and an outcome existing in such isolation is meaningless, and it doesn’t reflect a non static reality.

It’s not about money or girls or recognition and artistic realisation, it’s about your constant journey in regards to those aspects of our immediately present existence.

I been connecting with a lot more people recently. Probably I don’t know, somethings going on, maybe it’s portentous.

And I have to get organised for my tour. Like I’m definitely away for a week doing at least 4 gigs so I need to get my camera situation sorted out, I might need that 60d NOW.

I don’t care man. I want to film some stuff and maybe play some gigs while I’m away.

I key mix now man, it’s all good. Like, 90% of my mixes are pretty sweet – I think just particularly because of what I play being that I’m into deep melodies, my stuff HAS to be in key to work, and all of a sudden your sets are all making sense like a pro DJ, it all just seems to work.

It’s not as important as beat matching obviously, but at this (late) stage of the game, for me, it’s massive. It hasn’t made me a much better DJ but it has made me much less crap. I would have to work hard to play sets that were poor now, but I still think it might be awhile until I can bring beatmatching to the upfm show, 2 shows now, upfm and bassdrive, man! Well, the investment in DJing is getting quite deep, so we need to follow through.

I was just thinking about an army of dogs who live in grey lynn park and have secret bases an army ranks.

Do you go and tell a story about a dog army? What does it mean?

There is nothing but the story. The narrative.

In my philosophy, all things are at all times in conflict, everywhere. It is natural, and the suppression of natural expressions of conflict is detrimental. Conflict isn’t bad in itself unless it results in destruction, which is also natural and not necessarily bad. As long as you understand the resolution of every conflict is only transporting you to the next conflict, infinitely. How you deal with conflict expresses more than the details or subject of any conflict, regardless.

The stories and narratives that give our lives meaning are built on conflict.

Man I am clueless today. I hear the “voice of god” telling me to sort it out, but I really can’t manage it, like there’s some frailty to this paradigm I can’t quite comprehend. What I mean is that there’s much more than what I perceive, this world where you go to school and go to work and fuck your wife and go on holiday, and have kids and go back to work and not work and fuck your wife and not fuck your wife, and raise your kids and not raise your kids until you die. I’m certain there’s more.

The more I dwell on the thought that the thing that allows to have thoughts, that is, my brain, is not truly who I am but, simply a tool of other forces such as your genes that merely want to endure.

My body moves my brain around, sends it information and alerts it to threats. My brain allows my body to perceive complex notions of how systems work. Who really is me? If me doesn’t matter, outside of my physical existence and my mental existence, is there only my genetic existence?

The point is, without needing to go too deeply into it all is that I want to survive. How I survive in a modern context is governed by choices that are responses to conflict. Conflicts and the choices made to resolve those conflicts are the essence of stories. and stories are art.

It’s about what you truly want at whatever level you define yourself to be. What you truly want defines you and defines your story.

A story can often be more about discovering you wanted something different to what you thought you wanted. That’s why I’m interested in stories about fame and recognition because I think young people get sold on an image of winning approval and recognition through fame. I just want to be relevant.

Your physical self wants to eat and sleep and sex and maybe run around a bit sometimes. Your mental self wants to be valued and to have mastery and control, to exert dominance and amend the conditions to your favour.

How can you write drum and bass and do stupid youtube videos and a blog when you’re just some puppet to your genes? Well if a puppet is what I am, then I’m a puppet. My tunes and videos and blogs are reflective of my experience in this existence.

I want to get all the money and girls and attention, but so does everybody else! Society can’t function purely on the basis of our egos all crawling all over each other, clambering for gratification of base needs. But the fact that I’m aware of this makes it even more important that I try to comprehend it in a creatively expressive manner.

Is what I’m saying relevant? Does it mean anything to anybody else? Maybe that’s the question I should be asking.

Social manipulation is the currency of our times. In times past, larger more aggressive males held power. Now it is the socially agile and adaptable who exert power. How do you express the conflict of our present situation, it’s complexities, without stories and art?

As you try to climb the ladder, getting more money and better girls and more artistic manifestation, you just place yourself on a linear continuum, continually cycling through new conflicts, stories, one after the other, endlessly. Different day, same shit, until one day, different shit. But still shit.

How do you relate to your problems knowing they are basically endless? Well some problems are worse than others in regards to maintaining a minimum standard, but really when understand each conflict as a story it’s different . . .

More posts having to come out, just started way too many rambling posts and now I’m kind of worried not only will they make my blog boring and self indulgent as ever, but I won’t even have the chance to try and “take away” anything from writing screeds of thousands of words about archives and narratives and facebook and values, it all just kind of melds into a generalised artsy intellectual brown sludge.

But today we reflect on our archival narrative in a broader context and manage to get king arthurs knights running round after the grail which is pretty big, especially when it goes all illuminati with pagan occultists versus insane christian eugenicists.

But anyway I wasgetting started on a major new archiving push, mainly because I’ve been working too hard again and I couldn’t seem to get any art happening, even though I seemed poised to kick it up a level and actually have videos and songs rolling out.

Getting the rhythm right with money art and girls . . . 2 out of 3 ain’t bad? Fast, good, cheap, chose any two?

Why can you never get 3 going right at the same time?

It’s like playing the drums, I was always terrible at playing the drums, I’m naturally pretty unco-ordinated. Well it’s just another riff on the juggling metaphor isn’t it, trying to keep all your balls in the air? Doing the kick snare thing isn’t thaaat hard, but once you try and get the hat going and do rolls well forget about it.

I was a bit disappointed you might say, I thought I had more photos and a couple of my drawings were missing and I thought I would pull more old video tape. I thought I had a tape of us playing in palmerston north, but I guess not. I’ve got no performances of reality compound.

But I found tonnes of writing. I guess I was bummed because you can’t really tell quick stories with writing, but then I just turned up the view that it just means more challenging and different ways to tell stories. I got a bit silly hoping I could make the big production, and then I kind of lost the meaning, was a doing a time capsule or is this artist branding?

Well it’s both, it’s not one thing, it’s 2 things. What people who like my songs and videos see, won’t be what i keep for my personal consideration art and personal reflection aren’t one and the whole thing.

But the good thing was we got into some real dense thematic stuff when the archive allows me to see my own journey and what that story represents.

So we process all this stuff. Boxes of old photos, school reports, drawings etc.

I think the huge thing we didn’t just say . . . is that when you archive, you come to terms with what’s happened to you. As you understand your journey, you accept it and let the crap go.

Sometimes you only you got to a point with a feeling until you dropped it somewhere, and when you pick it up again, in your wisdom and hindsight you’re able to let it go.

I wondered what the point of it all was, did I have something to prove to myself? That I’d had an amazing life, but I simply forgot because I’m always to busy fretting and pondering?

When we have all the raw digital material we can look at what kind of story we want to tell. I’m working off a chronological tree, which cover certain subjects, eras and projects. I will add the content to those as appropriate.

I will also be building rankings for best pics, best songs, best stories, best nights, mad lists, that another kind of grid we’re mapping on.

But then I want to do a highlights reel, the superquick guide, and just to get meta we should have several different versions – same story but told in a different way – history channel doco, e channel style, sitcom, kids show, gritty drama or whatever . . .

. . .

Well I might have wanted to, but i don’t know if we’ll have enough footage, I was a bit inevitably disappointed like i spent the other night getting excited I could build some kind of time machine but I got a bit carried away.

But it allowed me to see I’m doing 2 things, what I’m doing artistically and personally are actually 2 different things.

In art you have the potential to use mystery, shadows and darkness to your advantage. Archiving is also a branding exercise and often a story is told by what is not present, this exercise is about seeing what I’ve got and what story I can tell with it. There are questions for every artist of who are you, and where did you come from, and the brand narrative you want to create.

What is that brand narrative?

What subtext is created by the story as it is told?

What does it mean if I say that I was a smart, weird little kid that fought to become one of the cool guys just to unfold into a world of music, drugs, capers, of internet culture intrigue, of drama in the city, the times of the era, and finally my absolution through hard toil to build my business, that the prodigal son would return and be forgiven.

I think in a way your flaws make you more who you are than anything else, that is essential to the narrative.

Archiving gives me the raw content I have available to deal with the presentation of reality and fashion it into a artistic vibe. Sometimes I just feel as if I can’t beat my own personal vibe so I may as well go with it. Sure, I can be funny, but the fact that I am so naturally doubtful, analytical, worrisome, changeable, is a part of my art. If people like my music and my writing and my videos, it doesn’t mean that most days I’m not straining for meaning to a point that most people would find labourious, but that’s just me.

It’s dramatic in it’s own way, that I have artistic license to indulge the fantastic edge of the reality I experience. What is it?

If I have a good job and I make music, write and do videos, and I have stories of crazy gigs, drug dealing, myspace adventures, I’m stylish and tasteful, it makes me more human and relatable to admit I am anxious and prone to dwelling on the neurotic, overwrought.

I think that’s why it’s “reality” compound, I’m halfway between a character and a real person, the fact that I am real and have reality based reactions creates an instant depth. Most reality shows are fiction pretending to be reality. My concept is reality pretending to be a stupid youtube act.

So in fact the only way to forgive my indiscretions of not being a courageous hero, but instead racked with self doubt is because I am real and when I excel, I attain a true and dramatic triumph, and tell the story of why some people can never quite find their peace.

I think that is the longer arc of the project.

That we must resolve our hopes and dreams into something we can live with. We have a search party which themes on great quests.

And that’s when the thematic concepts kicked off.

The search for the vibe, is like the search for the holy grail, it’s a search for something that represents an ideal and yet the narrative never completely exposes to the characters the futility of searching for an ideal as embody in a concept of the grail. The grail is the powdered tiger penis again, a concept that has been forced to take a tangible form in order to characterize the narrative.

The powdered tiger penis represents the possibility of power that exists in secret and cunning ways, but the power itself reperesents not grinding up a tigers dick but a zen state of serenity and purity from which power and mastery flows.

The Quarterback who flies the f-14 is the ubermensch Percival, the brave and honourable knight of romantic antiquity that quests for the purity of the grail, this links with don quixote who has made guest appearances, and the ill fate of lost quests for nobility. With the grail you’ve also got a knights templar thing going, throwing open the doors on any conspiracy you like, not to mention the full gamut of religious metaphors.

You got knights templar illuminati cats questing for relic power, and they’re connect with act party eugenicists but I was just trying to work it out. So there’s sects trying to blend into society and fascist right wing christians want to speed up evolution by experimenting with eugenics, and shutting down occultists/pagans who preserve ancient ways. It’s kind of hard to tell really.

You achieve progressive, advanced, capitalisitc civilization through christian organisation, but this becomes twisted into arrogant power crazy eugenicists, who want to crush dissent so they can achieve more progress in evolution, but the concept is totally flawed because it’s not about any kind of adaptation. Are the pagan occultists non progressive? We know they may invoke rituals and individual expression and wild sex parties but it’s hard to understand what they want other than to be destroyed by the christian eugenicists.

Well I guess that kind of got crazy but we’re getting far enough for now. When we realise right wing eugenicists in NZ are trying to get the powdered tiger penis / holy grail etc because they don’t want free individuals who don’t love backing the all blacks going around thinking ideas that are not favourable to the advancements of eugenics, then we’re ready to go deeper.

So the powdered tiger penis is just waiting to be revealed as the grail, and the quest alive as ever. The grail, the fountain of youth, represents power in energy and potential renewed.

It also says a very central message – that anyone can be powerful within themselves, that’s the carrot that is held out to us, and it is a real carrot, but capitalism keeps repeatedly beating our heads with the stick so we never have the chance to accept we are powerful.

There are conditions that create the society we live in and I despise the suggestion that this is natural, but just like all kinds of evolution, so must power adapt. Power used to be principally about physical strength, stamina and constitution as it still is in the animal world, yet in our world the concept of power changes, and insightful thought processes as intuitive interaction with technology becomes far more valuable than physical strength.

Ok I went totally off point then, but then well all our message is is some revenge of the nerds, trading places, vibe but what does it really say? That in life we are all relative to our circumstances? Yes so we have to try our best, don’t let some corny rich good looking smart arse pricks act like the run the game, give them a go, fuck them and their arrogance, to think, to assume they have rights others don’t because they were born with money or looks. And that is occultist, pagan, anarchist, chaotic, talk, christianity and media has been about control.

You can’t be controlled by the pervasive suggestion you fit into the system.

I am the imperfect character. I am the genetically unfit, but I refuse to be told I can’t be beautiful and rich and famous and talented. But it’s a vain and desperate and empty world, so you peel back the layers.

To me it’s a very defining thing to bring this richness to my character, I depict that guy who’s just never happy with what he’s got, not just wanting more, but meant for it. It shows my flaw is that while I flout my disrespect for it, I also want desperately to accepted by it, so the long arc is about accepting what your choices really are. When you decide to let go of the value you placed on fame and recognition and respect, you make room for something more important.

The search party goes deep. The search for the vibe goes backwards and forwards. We’re pulling up stuff into the narrative and we can do as we like with it, if we need to sauce it up then we can.

I remember learning that with RC, that if you couldn’t throw down like a boss, the next best thing was to go to the depths of confession, and much amusement could be had with the character for whom nothing is ever acceptable.

People are supposed to see me becoming indignant and petty and see this behaviour in themselves and others, ad reflect on what the true value of seeking recognition, and the game you buy into.

But yeah if the powdered tiger penis turns out to be on some holy grail deal, when you start to wonder about why the space captain has been sent from another dimension well you got to wonder about what kind of vibe we’re talking about. I’m just a marketing guy who makes drum and bass. This is getting insane.

Hi I’m Dr. Matthew Turner and I’m one of the senior research team here at Romantech Group – an interdisciplinary project dedicated to new research initiatives.

More people are becoming interested and curious about the kind of work we perform here. We experienced a higher average number of visitors this week so we thought perhaps we’d share what we see as the Romantech Group vision. Clear sightedness in pursuit of excellence.

To the diligent, nothing is difficult.

(that’s secret code by the way in case you didn’t know, for when secret wolf team alpha eagle squad force gets the signal to carry out a E0S79YT)

The Romantech Group is based on 4 steps of a 3 Sided pyramid. 4 steps: Timeless, Urban, Underground, and Romance, on 3 sides Ca$hmoney, Girls, and Art.

(This is such important exposition stuff here you guys oh my god sorry for talking but omg you guys)

A lot of our research is based around funding certain projects which we see as contributing to the broader vision of the Romantech Group.

So what do people want to read about? What would be a good blog? Something that was going on, basically. What’s going on? Well you have to have a look don’t you. We decided to form a search party. And now the audience knows about the sinister research laboratory.

So the search team sets off, and it all goes gonzo because the search team are all wrapped up in their own nonsense, what’s worth searching out? Space Captain Romantech has crashed on earth and established a camp living amongs the native inhabitants. He must go out and find the vibes to take him back to his home planet, but he also uses online media to convey messages back to his home world. We don’t know why he crashed here, was he set up?

So the captain must go out and explore. In fact “Dark Matter” does has that vibe of the – what was the idea? They have some kind of virus code on a disc – the scientists, but then the program is unleashed and to many funky vibes blow the core reactor and scientists and possibly funky radioactive ravers are forced to rave out.

So you can see there is definitely sinister suspicious activity happening in the laboratory, and that there’s probably something afoot.

The search team are searching and they are reporting information. So I dress up in my spacesuit and I go and I search.

I’m space captain Romantech, and my ship has crashed and I am looking for vibes so I can refuel my ship and get back to Planet Romantech and our plan to throw down vibes across the universe in support of vibe friendly lifestyles. So we need to contact locals about underground vibes, underground parties, and underground art, and if they know about any underground parties and if we can come.

I’m the space captain. And I’m coming to get underground and get all the vibes, and discover the people and talk to them and stand in a closet if it’s funny and try to kick off #brooming. Standing in a closet is about to go global because your basically just nicely put away where you don’t have to see or feel or be.

In the Romantech Group lab (what’s the connection, you guys?) it gets kind of freaky. But this is science, it’s unwavering gaze never broken, and never wavering in it’s effort to snatch a glimpse of the truth, no fear how ghastly. A better mousetrap.

We’re trying to get people to come here and sign up for terrible scientific trials to be carried out so that they go into a daze and think they’re like y’know, desert warriors and space captains and DJ’s and all sorts.

They become highly susceptible. Open to suggestion.

You say, sign up for the newsletter, get downloads and stuff. It’ll never work. What’s in the newsletter? The music downloads.

It has to be like the wrestling was, like free stuff on TV was boring, only on the special nights was there a proper fight. That’s pretty complicated. People don’t want to read a whole lot of junk about space men and scientists on your blog, that’s why they sign up for the newsletter.

But honestly someone will be all like, what’s up with the space man, and they won’t be ready to find out I come from another planet.

SO there’s parallels with lord jonathan who is also on an adventure. And also space captain Romantech might be a bit of a hipster space captain, like he’s like, whatever, y’know, where are the underground parties at?

I’m an alien okay, so just sort yourself out.

Look don’t have a problem with me because I’m from another planet, okay? Like, I just want to party, I just want to coonect with some real artists, artists with integrity.

Talking to a hottie: “Look you don’t understand, I’m an alien okay so I need to make contact with your home base.”

“Our people need to connect. Give me your number. You wanna know what a tentacle feel like?”

And there was going to be ziggy or some guy on the inanimate disembodied computer guy tip. So I could let him know my reports on the humans and he could make suggestions that could get interesting. We want to get interesting. We want to find the interesting.

Space captain romantech will have to put together a search party to provide initial reports, surveillance and interesting intelligence pertinent to bringing the vibe back.

What do you mean about what I mean about the Season Finale? This is actually where you find out the weird secrets of Romantech Island, and like, tonnes of gripping revelations that explain everything. I just totally need a a top secret research facility with sinister clipboard holding scientists, that’s all, and we’re good to go.

Have you got one I can borrow? It’s just for the opening scene, and like the season cliffhanger at the end.

So, I experienced a fleeting moment of freedom when I started to figure wow, hey, we’ve gotten through a lot of rambling, it’s good we can start really trying to work out what else we can do except . . . until – we apply a concentrated effort to start writing decent blogs.

My first strategy is heavy editing, and less pondering – if we can crack a conclusion that can be thrown around why faff about with all the theoretical workings, going off on tangents with apologist anecdotes, why bother, if you try and say something rather than mumbling across multiple supporting paragraphs before you get to your point, you might come up with a more hard hitting post, that gets to people.

Also I have a habit of smashing one post into another, because I’m bored and just want to post my adsense ads up so I can squeal when I make $2. Just like this one, writing half a post about one thing and then writing the other half about something else, though I like the car crash sensibility when the blog suddenly veers off in another direction. Sure, be stylistically fluid but get concise, get audience focused and draw on what people want to read about not just some personal crisis I want to get off my chest.

This seems like a bit of a series finale, I reckon. Mainly because I feel like I’ve got a lot of rambling off my chest – once I got into the gender politics I figured I just ramble on about anything, and it’s hard to appreciate what it means to know what you think. It’s also because I’m keen to slow down a bit, I’m getting more and more confident that more money is not what I’m looking for right now, which is a relief. It’s knowing that doing less work is actually working out better, and so I’m starting to be less anxious about working less, even though I do waste more time, because i’m only kidding myself thinking extra money is not a waste of time.

It’s like my bank account has put me in the friend zone. No matter how close we get, we’ll never have any “real” fun.

In fact, it’s not the money, it’s I just I want to do something. Making money is the easiest and strongest way for me to feel like I’m getting something done, but it’s . . . I haven’t found the balance yet, maybe I need to keep readjusting my business effort down until such a point where I do feel bored and poor. Because feeling anxious about being bored and poor and actually being bored and poor aren’t always consistent.

But okay if it is a season finale, I want it to be a bit like Lost or something, where it just blows your mind. That’s why wanted this exposition at a research facility. But the producers are telling me we can’t afford all that they know I’ve blown out the budget, and they need to put this to bed, they need this thing in the can with a pretty bow on it.

I’m sure you’re all keen to find out what happens in the big fight between Fantasy and Reality. It’s what the fans deserve, okay? This is my art you’re talking about, if you want art, then I need a fucking top secret research facility, okay or you’ll never put this story straight.

I didn’t think Reality had the chops, but it’s a matter of whether fantasy can be beaten. Maybe Reality won’t lose, but can it win?

What about all the loose ends? The Friday Night Killer, the elusive desert fox, my therapy, what exactly happened there? In the fullness of time alright? Let’s just say it’s not in the budget right now, because we can’t afford an exposition with a top secret research facility with scientists you know that ONLY TIES THE WHOLE THING TOGETHER you RETARDS! God, I’m working with imbeciles. Retarded autistic baboon children with rabies and aids. That’s who I work with.

These people don’t seem to get it. They don’tunderstand. This is my blog, this is my art, and if you’re going to put a bow on anything in a can in a bed, my vision has an exposition with a frickin science laboratory, top secret research facility SO SORT IT OUT!!!

Okay. Thank you. God! Rolling with the top secret research facility cold open in three, two . . .

. . .

I would contend we have a very high level of research going on at the Romantech blog, although we have our issues like any other facility would face, we face challenges in problem solving and creative provision of solutions.

We have our psychotherapy centre as you will be aware, and we have research on cultural issues also being conducted.

I am aware some serious projects are going ahead in the labs at this time, but of course considering the important and broad ranging nature of the research we’re doing

In fact I might even start a think tank. Y’know? Like just get millions of dollars for like doing “research”, y’know?

We could provide a distinct lack of documented evidence of climate change. That seems like an easy job, just do a quick look around the house. Nope, no climate change there. Or we could research why Bob Geldof doesn’t like mondays. Maybe because . . . well it’s certainly not a straightforward question. $10 million should get us started nicely.

It will be the Romantech Group. We’ll have sinister meetings with bodyguards and stuff.

But for now you have to basically be excited about all the research we’re publishing, case studies, and some really interesting emulation experiments we’ve taken place.

That’s right we’ve take place. The other researchers and I happened earlier. It’s very modern technology and it’s under wraps but some of our resident fellows will presenting some of their research so you’ve got to put up with it.

Obviously the research is around observing the experiments going on around the facility with perceptions of reality and fantasy on the patients.

The results have been interesting, the iterations in perception of the patients is most revealing.

Brain transplants, conspiracies with neanderthal bloodlines, flying pyramids, tribal warrior fantasies . . .

Here we’re researching a choice . . . you always have a choice.

Now this next bit is an awesome sinister exposition where you like I’ve been cloned and somehow i’m all like cloned up in pods or like little weird kind of booths where I’m all hooked up with wires to my brain and you can see in one booth I believe I am a desert warrior, in another I’m the detective looking for the friday night killer, in another I’m a drum and bass DJ, space captain crash landed on earth, hamlet, in one booth I think I’m talking to my therapist, in the next, another clone of me is talking to god . . .

Maybe it could be shown with sinister scientists watching monitors so you can show what’s going on, but we don’t have to reveal that their are even clones. Forget I even mentioned clones. All you see is that I’m in this facility being tested, obviously playing out all the different roles of the season, so it’s totally a bit of an OMG moment.

MAN DID THIS SHIT JUST GET CRAZY WEIRD OR WHAT, RIGHT YOU GUYS?

shut up it’s not a “dream all along”! They’re clones in a frickin research facility okay?

Now we’re doing a flashback review so we can go back to like way way back and then bring the narrative together in the end where they break into the facilityor out of it or something I dunno, you’ll have to find out. It’s the big romantech season finale, okay? Like wow.

The investigation continues, the investigators turn over the facts as they’ve been described over again and again in their heads.

No body, no evidence, no crime. It just doesn’t feel right. Maybe they just haven’t begun to ask the right questions.

I was worked up about the DJing situation, yo. I know this one. It’s the one where you think a situation is fine and you don’t pay attention and you get a nasty reminder that all gardens need weeding. All trash needs taking out. But how ugly would it get?

In days past I would have tried to plan a way around or through, but I’m smarter than that now. You need resources to make moves and I don’t have the resources available. I see them constantly, these dudes with their dreams, they don’t have the resources they need.

I dunno I just . . . basically, there life may be over. They may have served their purpose for the man at the top. There’s only so much use a person can serve really. But who was at the top in this equation?

Blogging is okay but it’s really not. Blogging is my creative cave from where I spring like the tiger munching on errant villagers which fall to my prey, but it’s been awhile since I tasted fresh meat and living in a cave isn’t exactly a dream come true. So why do I do it? Because you’ve got to be inspired to make art. You need to have that feeling that some art is going to come out of you.

My music was all about narratives, so here I am back writing. But the music I’m writing is not perfectly suited for the dance floor, but it does tell stories, and that’s why I feel I need video on my side. To me, that’s my art form. Storytelling. The music and the video together make a story. I mean that’s probably not that revolutionary to you, but to me, I never really though until the last few years that I would ever want to do video stuff because well – didn’t I know it was going to be challenging? But it’s important to have a vision for your art, it comes down to doing it out of inspiration, not seeking admiration.

That’s serious art. When I pack my set full of drum and bass bangers and not the music I truly like to play in the club, and then I get told I need to improve . . . well, I was only doing it to seek approval anyway, so why bother?

I’m working on being excited about my modesthaus videos because to me they tell a story. If I’m trying to rock the club it’s about wanting some kind of recognition – from others. Telling a story is getting recognition from yourself.

See? I’m a guru, ok? The video for “Problemantech” is really modest but it’s got themes of frustration, the appropriation of adequacy and normative behaviour. There’s a message there about projecting an image taking precedent over any requirement of actual substance to that projection.

I was going to do a video for our forthcoming track “low key” based on the raw footage I have, which is supposed to be about places amidst the night life where nothing much happens, life continues quietly. If you’re a plant in the entrance to a club, you’re existence is pretty low key. A lot of club kids walk past, and some dude probably drops an empty beer bottle behind you as he exits the club. It’s about spaces that exist where nothing much is going on.

I was going to do a video for “juice of life” where I’m an investigator on NSU’s tail. It cuts between me in a suit asking random people for info on NSU but nobody knows who he is and lo fi ripped youtube footage from NSU gigs. Again the concept is an unsolved mystery, which feeds into the underground theme of things happening below the surface that nobody is aware of. In fact I would say the video is a metaphor for trying to find underground vibes.

Buy as I’ve alluded to apocalypse now, I think the underground has dark mysteries, and though the trail runs cold, there’s the inference that something big is lurking below the surface.

I can see how I could be cobbling together a musical, with linear elements. especially if they could be arranged in different ways . . . omg . . . like the morphospace concept. Y’know just like a “pick a path” you could “play” the game as me and once I started to have say, 10 videos, I could string them together, not only into a DJ mix, but the videos would “mix” also, cutting the narrative between two separate videos to dovetail while the 2 songs mix, and you’d have a nice little half an hour “episode”.

I’d be just like R. Kelly!

See? That sounds like some art. That sounds like when I’m 60 I wanna dose up on some incredible gear and check out the mad art stories I was telling.

Here’s a bonus time lapse at the lighthouse video with some trip hop. I don’t think I’d stop short of pillaging pretty videos like this if I needed to use some more visually striking high end vibes to work into my narrative, as long as I didn’t lean too heavily, it’s just like “sampling” if you’re recontextualizing to build something new.

Especially when you sample some rich orchestral sounds or big band, you can’t make that in your bedroom any other way, and thats what using more visual footage is like, I don’t have the equipment or skill to ever shoot stuff like this that is sumptuous yet not really explicit in any narrative sense.

Night Motion Timelapse: Outer Banks from Daniel Dragon Films on Vimeo.

Power Supply, and Dark Matter will head up the B team, I will get an some outsourced help to help me work on some basic concepts when I get around to it. Power Supply could be a good one for the photos I’m collecting now, plus I could do some filming in surplustronics and similar stores so I get some movement with lots of electodes and nodes and gear.

Gonna Getcha and Pure Juice being more upbeat tunes need a more upbeat concept, you can’t just be mysterious, brooding and vague, cryptic when the video is a more funky or uplifting vibe.

Polyps is part of the home alone family so must be connected with that theme.

Beyond Faith I think will be my first opportunity to seriously approach working with outsourcers to produce something perhaps still absstract and cryptic, but a little more refined and tailored.

That’s 8 songs. The last 2 forthcoming are “Animals” and “Weirdos” which I don’t care for either a great deal, and both are heavier so again, I might wait until they are done and they can be the first 2 videos I just pay some overseas guys $100 to do. If I wanted to use them as part of a narrative, the strategy would be to make them vague but to have a narrative bridging effect where it could be used in between any two other more sinister videos as of course being heavier tunes, they are more likely to work in the set with similar tunes.

Of course I’d like to flip it and maybe get some footage and clips and edit it up and write a beat to it, but that’ll come when I’m ready to try new things to keep the momentum going.

What’s the story you’re telling?

It’s all about the story you’re telling, what’s it about? What’s the message in the narrative?

Well there’s the space captain, the DJ romantech, the pirate, and there are garden variety vibes existing in the street.

There is some subtext concerning the powdered tiger penis which is a metaphor for power and glory acquired swiftly by dubious means. Occultist neanderthals compound a theme of an ignorant society, while hamlet is the shadow throwing into relief the inevitability of our own demise.

There are other characters, but it’s clearly just Matt, who is a guy doing all of this. Matt is a marketing guy, matt is somewhat desperate to prove something. There is a sad yearning to be “somebody”. Though I think we see that Matt is an okay person and has a lot of redeeming merit, it is somewhat the desperation, the calculating, the unflinching willingness to compromise for true success that makes him also a pathetic figure.

It’s Matt’s “permanent dissatisfaction” which pushes him on, and seperates him from the world he seeks to inhabit because it’s never about fakeness or pretentiousness, it’s genuine earnest desire to participate at the highest levels. This tells a story about the true reasons people want to be recognised, validated.

Everybody wants to be important, and everybody thinks they’re important.

Is now a good time to touch on revisions and allusions to don quixote?

Too late! From Wikipedia:

“He has become obsessed with books of chivalry, and believes their every word to be true, despite the fact that many of the events in them are clearly impossible. Quixano eventually appears to other people to have lost his mind due to lack of sleep and food from dedicating all of his time to reading.

He decides to go out as a knight-errant in search of adventure. He dons an old suit of armor, renames himself “Don Quixote de la Mancha,” and names his skinny horse “Rocinante”. He designates a neighboring farm girl, Aldonza Lorenzo, as his lady love, renaming her Dulcinea del Toboso, while she knows nothing about this.”

Before I lose the thread where are the most fundamental connections? Well the concept of “adventure” I’ve talked about profusely and that is has a romantic, idealistic quality.

Don quixote is an idealistic dreamer who sends up the values of the era. For him it’s about being a chivalrous knight, for me it’s all about being cool and awesome, rich and famous and super socially buccaneering, but I never see that I am really a joke.

The character of Matt supresses a romantic fondness for the city and the night, in an attempt to be a hardnosed hustler, which always fails.

I should call my beamer “Rocinante”.

Everybody wants to be important, and everybody thinks they’re important.

I think it’s a battle of two individualisms, the romantic version which is in a lamplit park sharing innocent moments with some young girl, and the version that wants to be important, to feel that they have to matter more, that they do.

What is it? That the beautiful person, the smart person, fall into their own traps?

What is the end? The end is acceptance.

I roll like Kafka, they see me rolling, they hating – because I’m a giant bug – tryna catch me metamorphisizing – like they ain’t seen a giant bug before.

Wouldn’t you rather keep it up tight with the great masters than be some droning maggot hatching out of a dead dog’s ass? Because I was about to jump on Twitter – or you might say facebook but I’m not that far gone – but then I got scared because of all the neanderthals there who are consistently plotting to enslave me.

I’m almost positive that Kafka and Cervantes were not neanderthal descendents, but certainly if you log on to twitter and you’ll find neanderthals there. Maybe they’re not occultist neanderthals, they’re just kind of “meta-distracted”, I understand that concept, it’s times like this I realise just how easy it is to jam up your thought processes – I got no gigs or odious commitments that are likely to lead to this situation right now and boy am I upbeat about that.

It’s all about neanderthal management. Management of neanderthal related outcomes. People are on their facebook and twitter going on about nonsense that makes less sense than the conclusions of my thesis related to occultist neanderthal and powdered tiger penis conspiracies involving interdimensional space and time travellers.

I don’t get it but it frightens me. They are coming to get me.

In the story – but we know it’s not true, it’s all just a metaphor for alienation.

What is the acceptance there? It’s kind of open ended. Either I settle into something else, or I continue to range farther and wider in my attempts to follow various plans. It might end with me settling into a new format, it might continue with focus shifted from me.

But I think new themes are waiting, there’s the one about letting what other people think define your behaviour and whether you should do that, maybe exploration of my misanthropy, I don’t really like people, I don’t feel the need to be close to them, yet we long to be adored.

I guess it’s another way of illustrating the perversity of modern individualism.

just because you’re not posting a photo of yourself making sexyface in a bikini, doesn’t mean your array of pithy quotes and Instagram cityscapes isn’t a form of self-conscious brand creation.

Well, I am just still not happy about my video camera being pinched, because it’s hard enough as it is to get motivated to do video stuff. Pretty much.

Here’s a post on sorting out some of the videos we plan to make if the day ever comes! We really have two issues. Making the damn videos, and getting the framing set, getting a concept the platform is supposed to roll this. It’s about presentation and the image for an audience of WHY this crap even exists.

This post I’m just trying to go over the current state of the ideas we’re planning to do in the effort that ever more modest concepts will eventually lead me to do something.

We need to get up out of our bed and get to making some videos.

Sunlight is no good for writing deep beats with an urban consciousness, well not really, sunlight is good for making videos. Making videos as it turns out is even harder than songs. And Bob Lefsetz is talking about procrastination and Seth Godin is talking about shipping and it amounts to the same.

Do something, and hope. You mis 100% of the shots you don’t take. 80% of success is just showing up.

Each time you do something it’s a chance for something to happen. Each time you don’t do something, the chance is lost.

We’ve been playing with ideas a lot in video because of 2 concepts:

- That we want to have made a start at least by March. If it gets to march and we don’t at least have 1 new video, then shame on me.

- That modesty is our only soft parameter. If we’ve ideas for things like “home alone” and we’re going through a bit of an anti-funny anti-fun kind of philosophical bent, then we just have to get simpler and simpler until we can do it.

VIDEO IDEAS

We want to make videos. And music, and say something before we drop dead and maggots infest and gorge on our decaying tissue.

We talked about Drunksploitation which was a style of video based on drunk people wanting to make fools of themselves if you point a camera at them.

It’s low brow, but we are making any concession we have to get this thing moving, and as always perhaps we can frame it a new way rather than “I met these drunk dicks and I filmed them. Bet they feel like dicks now. haha.”

It’s a real battling struggle between getting something out there and setting the frame with care and detail.

Man again, I’m reading over old posts and seeing just how many ideas I seem to come up with. Maybe I need to make more of an effort to explain what I am on about, because the ideas are there, it’s just I’m always rambling and apologizing for my self.

It was only just over a month ago that I was writing about the space captain DJ Romantech in another dimension with Hamlet and playing poker with Time and Death and all kinds of abstract surrealism spewing forth. But unfortunately writing is a lot better for putting ideas down fresh than it is to easily represent ideas, well, what I’m saying is writing can be boring when compared to a dumb video or some slamming tunage.

In the episode “Noob Eats New Beats” I think we experienced some time travelling effects in terms of the context, but however, this was where we really tackled modesty.

It was supposed to be self titled as “My New Light” because it’s about my new light. Unfortunately, I got the battery fixed so I have 6 hours max capacity battery life on the camera, but now my light I got won’t hold a charge!!!

Stupid crappy chinese stuff!

Anyway, it’s supposed to be super unambitious, about me, my thing, and then going out into the street and the night and sort of framing that a bit and then asking some questions to random passerbys

I’m all about the street. In the street is where the people live in the houses, and girls who are young beautiful they listen to the latest songs and wait for their dreams to come true.

These are all the houses but no one really knows who is in them, but they all have lives. All have stuff going on with their lives.

This is my BMW

I like to roll in BMW in the streets, and I’ve got my camera, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

I don’t know.

Can I have an interview man? I don’t have the answers man, look at me I don’t have a clue.

Am I even asking the right questions? What questions should I be asking?

Have you ever been married? Are you into like taking drugs and raving out to some drum and bass?

You can talk to girls?

Hi!

Would you like to be my girlfriend?

Did you know I’m a DJ? I have a BMW, it’s pretty nice.

Do you think it could work out between us?

You’re just going to take all my money and stop having sex with me aren’t you?

I only really wanted to be somebody.

I think it ends resolved with the concept of making beats, it’s supposed to follow a basic trail back to beats.

SO although it really is about “cinema of modesty” it follows a trail that outlines certain concepts – IE framing. Helping us to set the right frame, set the stage, for what is to come.

Home Alone was the first time where we began looking to aim low and at least fire a shot, that is was better to be modest and have something than be a precious perfectionist and continue to have nothing, to look seriously at what we has on hand.

home alone is:

- happy pov around the house – part 1

- sitting alone in odd light, smoking with decks part 2

weird portraits part 2

- sinister pov, flashes of haunted, ghosts part 3

- possibly shots of “outside world” part 4

- final mash up of all themes and resolution. last shot still sitting alone in silence part 4

Last Transmission was an interesting story where I play an alien sent to earth to teach people about DJing, that sort of evolved into a possible storyline where we are searching for vibes to fuel our mission home, so it’s a quirky concept linked to the search and exploration of the underground scene and the nu underground.

And then of course problemantech, my first and only video in 2 and a half years. And don’t forget we wanted to do hamlet’s soliloquy too.

Here’s a post where I talked about the foreseeable trajectory of the reality compound web video episodes, could I have all this done by the end of the year? There’s even a 5 year plan.

Here’s some stuff from my October plans for what I would be doing right now in January I guess the thing I said I would have RCTV2 done in the next 6-7 weeks. I hope I can do it, 6-7 weeks is a long time, but I have gigs I didn’t know I was going to have, and business looks to not be nearly as quiet as I had expected.

VIDEO

We know all our videos we want to do, I just want to make sure everything is started by february, that we have one episode at least, aswell as all the little foundation things I wanted to do.

Problemantech, Home Alone, Any haunted microscope stuff, any of my other romantech ideas like Last Transmission, AUckland’s Most Wanted, any Kurb character sketches, Jumjar, Lil Titty, Lord Jonathon. Do my Hamlet. Probably about 10 videos.

The ones I must have are:

Hamlet
Problemantech
RCTV2
Last Transmission /AMW/Home Alone

So I just got stuck in to some stuff for problemantech I think it will probably be hard work and the result wont be that great, but at least I would have gotten a start. And I think we have created a modest start. Yes it’s a bit disappointing that all this work will result in something fairly amateur and unpolished, where I’m not really impressing anyone, but at least I’m doing it.

Just started a fake twitter account.

It’s called thepowermaster, so I can make fun of internet marketing and law of attraction guru types and of course pick up artists on twitter and rag hard on positivity in general, it’s really an attack on how stupidly simple and dumbed down the solutions presented by these people are and how they only appear to be solutions designed for them to peddle some crappy product or service.

The power master can become a reality compound character and may even be merged with maximizing explosions, but generally it fits into the narrative by being another one of Matt’s hare brained schemes to raise cash.

It could also fit with “How to be awesome”. Again like reality compound is, “How to be awesome” could be launched of reality compound and romantech, and romantech could be the background for a series of power master videos.

Reality compound is no longer a band, it’s an entertainment brand, and Romantech is the music supervisor. There might still be reality compound singles or they might be Reality Compound featuring Romantech, but the whole idea of Romantech within the Reality Compound world is basically a guy who looks exactly like Matt, who obviously is Matt, is supposed to be another character who I guess is Romantech. Who I guess is the “real” me. The me I play in Reality Compound is just a character/caricture.

But the me I play plays characters because I am “trying to be funny”. The power master may be one of these characters alongside Lord Jonathon etc.

There’s got to be warrior kings on the tiger penis as well, may be it well be revealed that power master is a front for a powdered tiger penis racket, but I will also be seriousy selling $50 consultations with the power master. Which could be exposed as tiger penis related dealings.

The obsession with tiger penis is about power and realisation of true potential, of manifestation. It’s about the concept of becoming, made, projected into this object which is the powdered tiger penis.

What is the secret of the powdered tiger penis? Well it’s secret isn’t it, the powdered tiger penis is also a device for hiding any sensitive information you don’t want the world to know as you attempt to cut closer to the bone.

But any way, I’m off trying to be funny with the power master, where does the link go? To Reality Compound Youtube? Soon, I guess. But then it’s obvious reality compound does need it’s own site, it will be like the romantech site, except a mini world, there’ll be no attempt to hide links between the romantech and reality compound site, but it van be a portal with videos and news etc, just updates and what not.

Dog biscuits.

Tiger penis flavoured dog biscuits.

The dog’s got into my penis again!!! It’s bloody silly but I think it’s funny.

Feel the realness of the penis.

Feel the freeness of the penis

“Thinking of all the juicy penis for me . . . penis gives me wings . . . to fly away . . . to kiss the sky, I wanna see a brighter day . . .

Smiling faces, penis of joy . . . bringing penis to each girl and boy . . . “

oh god. I’m dying here. I love tiger penis!!!

Anyway, power master is a shady money making hustler. We could have endless “Aha!” moments when people constantly realise I’m every character I represent although I talk about this cohort in the 3rd person.

Romantech, Power Master, Lord Jonathon, Lil Titty, my nerdcore identity which could be Master Power, which would just a weird thing. Don’t forget Chocolate Lover Man.

Chocolate Lover Man is awesome, because he goes insane over the ladies, like he starts off as a sleazy mack with completely over the top ridiculous extended extended metaphors for sex but is so insanely overwhelmed by the ladies bodies, that he just goes insanely into an insane episode where he’s just on the ground losing his shit because of some chick, because the severity of style he promises to lay down is so severe it sends him into a fit and the girl probably just basically walks off.

It’s a shame the original chocolate lover man footage is sure to be gone. I know it woudn’t seem that good but it’s so authentic to have the original footage and then years later the developed concept.

Jum Jar is a one off character, Purple Cow is a one off, Auckand’s most wanted etc, etc, we don’t have many good other characters we can work with except maybe Kev the Contractor.

But yes if power master takes off, again we just have to resolve it by directing it all to the one funny marketing and music newsletter. But that’s cool I just have to have one good thing and direct people to items of interest, free stuff, then maybe peddle some hustle, oh one day, wondrous far off newsletter that might one day make money. One day?

Hi, it’s me DJ ROmantech, this is a kind of a round up of all the interesting things we kind of found out in 2010, this is part 1, part 2 is next.

Tough Love 2009 drum and bass mix – Liquid Drum and Bass

The Newsletter Post – when I was getting serious about my newsletter.

Right now I do want the fans but newsletters are really to find ways to make money from fans. Doing content and getting fans still must come first although it’s smart to build your newsletter in advance.

JANUARY 2010, reflecting on my music goals for the year:

“So writing tunes is important, but where schmoozing and scenery will be less important, building depth through secondary content will take it’s place.

i’d be happy just to know there’s 50 people in auckland, 500 people in new zealand, 5000 people around the world who are into my stuff, and make an effort to get the music, or come to see me play or whatever.”

MARCH, when I started to realise that business was not coming back after the summer . . .

“maybe today I am still getting closer to a place where in my mind I’m free to just be free. Just go with my laptop, with money and music at my fingertips, just go where I feel like going, do what I want to do”

March:

“it’s not what you do, it’s that you do it at all”

Making beats and being a participator makes you who you are, it matters to be that which you are. I think.

“you’re either doing or you’re done . . . you’re either being or you’ve been”

To do is to be.

This is where microscopic vibes began to arise. Because the scientist took this slide and wanted to examine the activity of these organisms.

“i’m not going to go on, i’m just making a point about boiling down ideas, this idea will lead to new ideas, ideas are what matter.

The more I write the more ideas will compound into something ever more real that maybe I can understand.“

So yeah, boiling and compounding scientific processes.

By APRIL we were totally humbled by misfortunes and grasping for a deeper reality, and we got deep into the haunted aspects of the microscope. That the science couldn’t be performed because of inexplicable ghosting and quantum activity.

Then we went on the alone house, home alone vibe, which was also to do with ghosts and haunted empty space, memories stretching back, re played in splendour . . . I see the sun forever setting over western springs college, western springs park, I remember the te puke production line and standing in the night with the roar of the sure wondering what life had for me.

Then I began to get going again, with my idea for an ebook, on the newsletter fan business tip – “how o be awesome” – it still remains an issue, I could probably leverage ebooks much better than I can my blogs, and it’s not as if I don’t write enough, so dumb ebooks designed to be dumb ebooks are good, especially if they help get the business side of things going.

By JUNE we were writing every day as we settled into a new situation.

There was a short allusion to the Knave of Hearts

And we begun publishing excerpts of my maunscript evil robot serialized, with lots of heavy advertising.

click here for more evil robot

Then we began digging into the relativity of me being depressed because I was poor, when in reality I was still earning above the average wage, and I thought a lot about how it was to live in auckland, to live in 2010.

That’s when the philosophy and existentialist business fired up as we began peeling back the layers, and hamlet made his first appearance for 2010.

June I just continued to post heavily, it’s insane, all these new concepts, plus, the next to come was the permanent tour, the first hint of finding adventure in travel interlocked with business.

It seems like when I arrived here at my new place for a fresh start, all these new vibes started shooting out insanely.

“It’s just a girl. It’s just a club, it’s just another day until you die.”

By the end of june I was already getting my teeth back into the reality compound comeback my mind was sprawling across all the possibilities and the meaning om money, and art and life.

It didn’t come until JULY that I mentioned:

“Well things have completely changed and are going really well now in terms of business.”

Then I was heating up, I wasn’t posting as much but I was getting video ideas coming through – the last transmission, auckland’s most wanted, kurb ads, the 4 points of auckland when I bought my bass.

We talked about a lot of stuff, the girls who liked me that I never noticed, the times we were heroes and kings to others but never really knew, we own our history and have a responsibility to take care of it, and from this the dawning of just how important solid archiving is began to emerge, and slowly the limits of what I planned to do took shape as I realised what it was that these plans led to, where the avenues were through puts and where they were dead ends.

Blogging, content, video, it had value for the future, but archiving was to find and grow value and pride and understanding in the past.

oh and here’s a link to my original january 2010 music goals for the year

nothing special just worthy to note that I’m still where I was and still need to do the same things.

So things well, were very strange as we peeled back into the layers of knowledge, many of the things I believed at the beginning of the year were only finely nuanced by events and understandings reached.

It’s time to wait and see and do part 2, though I don’t really know about that right now because it seems a lot of the longer posts have a habit of being more popular and get more hits. We’ll have to be aware in that area.